AN RAF medic who was medically discharged after being diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder is hoping that sharing her experiences will help others with the condition.

Michelle Sanderson had spent 20 years in the RAF and had completed three tours of Afghanistan as a frontline paramedic but she was forced to face up to the condition after her fiancé left and she lost her home.

Michelle Sanderson had spent 20 years in the RAF and had completed three tours of Afghanistan as a frontline paramedic before losing her fiancé and her home made her face up to the condition.

She has now started a blog and travels around giving talks about her experiences in the hope of helping others understand the condition or recognise that they may have it.

Michelle, of Long Lane, Hindley Green, said: “My most recent tour was as a frontline paramedic on the emergency response team so that was effectively going out and picking up the wounded and unfortunately the bodies from the point of wounding so as soon as it had happened really. But it wasn’t just the soldiers it was the civilians as well which kind of found me where I am to be honest.

“It is a shame now because I saw this as my career until I retired but obviously it is not to be for me now so I’ve got to find a different journey, wherever that is going to be.

“There are just too many triggers now. I couldn’t go out to Afghanistan or anywhere else again. I certainly don’t want to see the level of trauma again – it is just too much.

“I think the children got me quite a bit. It is not logical in my head that children should be out there.

“You are dealing with the soldiers that the Afghans had killed and then you have to pick up and look after the Afghans that had killed the soldiers.

“You’ve got that side of things to worry about – the emotional side of things but also the physical trauma in front of you.

“It is something that I never thought I would see. It shouldn’t be real life but unfortunately it was.”

Michelle’s illness can be triggered by a variety of things including fireworks, crowds and sirens and it causes her to suffer mood swings, panic and anxiety attacks and bad dreams.

She said: “I get strange looks when I am walking around with headphones in and then when I am agitated and panicky.

“I have had panic attacks outside and people have just looked and thought what is that freak doing sort of thing – I don’t mean that horribly but that is how they make me feel.

“This is why I want to speak up about it because there are so many people with it or with mental health problems in general. I think because they don’t understand it, they try and not ignore it.

“I want to fight it and I want to live with it instead of exist with it i determined to make something positive out of this.”

Michelle has reached thousands of people with her blog and is hoping to volunteer at the Veterans’ Council and Wigan and Leigh Hospice.

To contact Michelle, call 07854 192444, email stigmaorenigma@gmail.com or visit michellesandersonptsd.net to read her blog.